Let’s Talk About Love

In contrary to the worldly definition of love, feelings or attraction was never a determinant factor that brings together a man and a woman into marital relationship from the beginning. Adam was not in the know when God decided to make a help meet for him. He had never seen the woman nor known her for him to confirm whether she was beautiful, educated, sociable, civilized, religious, indigenous and well mannered. There was no place for feelings, or attraction since God was the author and the finisher of everything about their marriage.

Many marriages suffer today because the basis on which the relationship is built was feelings and attractions which gradually fade away and finally result to crisis.

The first marriage on earth took place in the Garden of Eden where God Himself joined Adam and Eve in a holy matrimony. This marriage was never recorded to have encountered issues as it is common today. Even in the face of their predicament after the fall of man, Adam and Eve remained calm and inseparable throughout their days on earth.

What could be the secret behind this marriage?

The woman was a significant factor in bringing down the man, yet he never picked offence and was able to carry on with the woman. How was he able to do that?

It was neither feelings nor attraction, could it still be love?

If yes, then what is love?

Genesis 2: 18, “And the Lord God said it is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him”.

This scripture helps us to uncover some truths about marriage and most importantly, the subject of love;

• Marriage is not man’s idea; the idea was completely God’s. Adam never thought of having a companion but God did and made him a help meet for him in Eve.
• God decides the personality of the woman, her look, even her character; it is never the man’s choice but God’s.
• God delivered the woman to Adam as a finished product for man to take as wife without any complain.

Today, before any marriage is carried out, every man want to see the intending woman to know whether she is beautiful, educated, civilized, religious, well-mannered and indigenous before her hand can be asked in marriage; feelings and attraction play a big role by seeing, touching, smelling and having different form of contact, but this is not how it was consummated at the beginning.

It is important to know therefore, no matter how fascinated we may be before the marriage, notwithstanding; if marriage is built on feelings, it may eventually end up in shambles.

Without any argument, the world still defines love as an attractive force that draws us closer to one another, as well as an intense feeling of deep affection or fondness or devotion to a person. But, If after all the feelings and the charming attraction, men still leave their wife in divorce, i think love is more than feelings and emotion. The bible says in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, “Love suffers long, and is kind; love envies not; love vaunts not itself, is not puffed up,

Doth not behave itself unseemly, seek not her own, is not easily provoked, thinks no evil;

Rejoices not in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;

Bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never failed:”

For Adam and Eve, it is already proven beyond any reasonable doubt that feelings and attraction played no role in their marriage. But, what was the secret of this wonderful marriage? The secret is still nothing but love. 1 John 4:8, “He that loveth not knoweth not God: for God is love”

We may need to ask ourselves the following questions so as to unravel this mystery;

·  Was there God in that relationship from the beginning?

Yes, God was the Alpha and Omega of that relationship.

    If God is love, was there love in that relationship?

Yes, there was love since God was there present even when there was no feeling or any attraction.

This tells us therefore that love does not exist without God. God is the foundation of love. When feelings and attraction rule the basis of our relationship with one another, God is not given His rightful place in such affair and as a result, love will be inevitably missing.

Love exists only in the kingdom of God, the world may not know how to describe it, but what we have in the world is not love. Nevertheless, it can be best described as lust. 1 John 2:15-16 “Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world”.